THE PAIN OF GOOD FRIDAY

It’s Good Friday, but Easter is just around the corner. It's possible that thinking like this allows to skip easily past Good Friday, and that is to our detriment. For Jesus' disciples, his mother and those who pinned their hopes on him the Friday he was executed was a day of darkness and pain - they did not think about resurrection.

I can’t imagine how long that night must have felt. Little sleep. Images of Jesus, bloodied, beaten and hanging on a cross in their minds. That pit in the stomach after losing a loved one.

For them, Easter was not around the corner - hope was a distant reality. When it comes to Good Friday, we don’t like to dwell too long on the day evil, violence and the power of darkness won. We are a culture of denial. We don’t like to admit to pain, struggle or sorrow. But Good Friday teaches us we can (and should) engage even our greatest darkness.

With this in mind, there are a few things we can learn from this day.

You will experience pain in this life. It’s been said the only thing we can be certain of is death and taxes. I’d add pain to that list. (Yes, I recognize both death and taxes are painful). We often seem surprised when we are hurt, but we need not be. Pain is part of life, and if you have not experience it yet – I have some bad news: You will.

We should not move on too quickly from our wounds. We cannot forget the friends, family and followers of Jesus sat with his death all day Friday and all day Saturday. When we are wounded we often want to move on quickly, and pretend like everything is okay. We can do better. Pain is master teacher – teaching us about ourselves, God, our world – and we must stay long enough with it to learn what it wishes to teach us.

If it hurts; it hurts. We often look at others and say, “I have nothing to complain about, think about how bad it is for him …” What we forget is that pain was never meant to be compared. If we have been wounded we need to deal with it. In my life, most of my pain comes in small doses. In the times I ignore it, all those small doses turn into something bigger – then there is a far bigger problem.

Sometimes evil prevails. It’s not a popular idea, but it’s true. There will be times in our life when we are knocked down, beaten up and betrayed and it seems that those that did it will get away with it. This is one of the most painful aspects of life. And it was how the disciples of Jesus must have felt the day Jesus died.

My hope is that today and tomorrow, we will have the courage to enter the darkness of Good Friday and Holy Saturday together. May we stand with Jesus at the cross, and remember him who bore our suffering, was pierced for our transgressions and crushed for our sin.

A BOOK TO READ AND RE-READ

When I met Mike Breen I had ideas. Lots of ideas. What I quickly learned is having ideas did not, and does not, separate me from anyone else. Most people I meet have lots of ideas too. And most of the time those ideas are better than mine.But Mike did not have ideas. He had experience. He had gone through the hard work of practicing his ideas for decades, and – no surprise – had learned a lot. And I quickly learned that he was more than willing to share what he had learned with everyone. The beauty is what he learned was tremendously simple. But don’t let that fool you.In its simplicity it proves to be tremendously difficult.Because it's not about doing what's always been done. Rather it's about doing what Jesus wants done. We've made the Christian life somewhat complex and easy to live. Jesus' teaching was simple and difficult to live. This is due to the fact that the way of Jesus - what he called the Kingdom - was more a movement and less an organized religion.This is what Mike has tapped into. What he speaks about is not just his experience, but also the experience of many others. The movement of which he spoke is something that has shaped and reshaped the lives of thousands, and has continued to do just that up to the present moment.After all, it's about the Kingdom. It was here long before us and will go on long after us too. The question is not about its longevity, but whether we will join with God's work on earth. This is what his latest book Leading Kingdom Movements is about. It is shared experience that will give you greater understanding into joining, forming and leading something that will long outlast any of us.The best part of this book is that it does not crush anyone’s ideas, or hamper idealism. Just the opposite. What I have found to be true about Mike is that his experience lends greater traction to the people’s ideas. I have found this to be true in my own life as a person, a disciple and a pastor. And this book is proof of that.If you feel like you have lots of ideas and want to see them move from theory to practice then you need to buy this book, read it, read it again and then give it to those you know who have all sorts of ideas. Because if we’re honest; ideas do not change the world – acting on ideas changes the world.And when we do that, we’ll find ourselves in the midst of a movement.

LETTING OUR KIDS FAIL

We can give our children a gift: failure. While many parents scoff at this idea; it's true. What the parents are ultimately teaching is that failure is not an option. Now, I'm no sadist, and I hate to see my own children experience the pain of failure, but failure will come to everyone at some point. As parents, we have the opportunity to teach our children that failure can be a master teacher - if only we let it.These days, however, it seems more parents are choosing to protect their children from failure. While they may think they are protecting them - in the end more harm may come than good. A common term for parents who hover over their children's every move is a "helicopter parent." These are the parents who are overly involved in their child's education - sometimes even doing the work for them. Some of these parents have even gotten involved in their child's salary negotiations - after their child has received a college degree.Recently Jessica Lahey wrote a wonderful, insightful piece for The Atlantic titled, "Why Parents Need to Let Their Children Fail." It's well worth the read, and teaches us that there are worse things than failure ... namely, not allowing our children to fail.

Read Jessica Lahey's article here.

NOTHING IS BETTER THAN LOVE

This is one of the most beautiful displays of love and devotion I have seen in a long time. Congrats to Conner and Cayden Long on being the Sports Illustrated 2012 SportsKids of the Year. Please take a few moments to watch this video. It is inspiring and humbling, and teaches us that nothing is better than love.You can read the full story about Conner and Cayden here.

FORGIVING AND (NOT) FORGETTING

Forgetting the harm someone has done to you seems nearly impossible. Perhaps you know exactly what I mean. Many of us bear scars that speak of a painful time.There are certain names, places and memories that are impossible to forget. It’s not that we want to remember what happened and go on carrying our wounds. The problem is that we cannot forget.A friend of mine has, in my opinion, an impossible situation with regard to forgetting. His life has been reshaped because of the betrayal he experienced years ago. Everyday there are reminders all around him of what has been done. He simply cannot forget. He beats himself up over this often because he has been told his entire life he is supposed to “forgive and forget.But what do we do when, like my friend, when we have experiences that are so painful we cannot forget? If we cannot forget painful experiences then how can we forgive? We can all agree, this is not easy. In fact, it’s tremendously difficult and painful.But maybe it’s supposed to be; consider the central symbol in Christianity: The Cross.What does that do but remind us of the mess and brokenness that led Jesus to go there? Why does the Bible promise us that God will not remember our sins, if Jesus has the marks of execution on his body? Central to John's vision of the life to come in the book of Revelation is the Lamb looked as if it has been slain. How can God forgive and forget the sin that led to the death of his Son?How is the Lamb, the cross, the execution marks on the hands and feet and side of Jesus a symbol of forgetting? It is in this paradox that we see the beauty.In the cross we see the memory of sin placed squarely on the person of God who removes our sin and the memory of pain. It’s as though God himself says, "I'll take your hurt - all of it - even the painful memories. This is what I did this when I died for you."Our hope lies in the reality that in the new world God will sit on a throne in a world in which the old order of things has passed away - all things are new - even our memories. Paul reminds us that we are new creatures, and that the old has gone. What does this mean?It means that as much as you have been shaped by your hurt, your hope is in the already renewed life that Jesus has given you. This life says that rather than pain shaping your past you have been freed to remember the power and freedom of forgiveness. It’s not that we dismiss the pain, or discount the difficulty of our journey. But it does mean that we recognize that even our greatest wounds, deepest pain and greatest agony will one day be transformed into beauty by the God who wastes nothing.And we should never forget that.

IS HONESTY THE BEST POLICY?

Many are told the practice of honesty is the best thing, but for very good reasons a lot of people have a hard time believing that to be true. Let me explain.I went to a small, conservative faith based university. Needless to say there were a lot of rules, and each rule was accompanied by a penalty if one decided to break it. One night a few guys decided to break a particular rule that addressed drinking alcohol.They went out had a couple of beers, some people who were not there found out and the rumor mill churned out lies about them with alarming speed. The false rumors spread, until at last two of those who were out drinking decided it was time to come clean.They admitted to one of the deans of the college what they had done. They told him they had lacked integrity since they had signed a piece of paper agreeing to abide by the rules of the school. The dean’s response was swift. He told them they were immediately expelled.Then the rumors really started flying. These two guys became the object of scorn in the eyes of many. A few professors at the school took it upon themselves to make unkind statements about these guys, and several students saw it as a chance to condemn them as well.What happened after was amazing.Student after student decided it was time to open up about their problems, and admit to the rules they had broken. One might say a revival broke out … okay, that is not honest. In fact, it was just the opposite. What many learned through this was that being honest and admitting to messing up immediately preceded getting beat up by judgment.So people kept their mouths shut for fear of what might happen to them. In my experience I have seen this time and time again. The heartbreaking thing is that it often happens among Christians. Which is a bit of a mystery to me.Central to the Christian faith is the belief that all people are dead in sin and in need of salvation. Which means, if you say you are a Christian you are admitting that you’ve messed up. But somehow many have gotten to the place where being a Christian means you are supposed to have all your stuff together. And if you admit you don’t; well then comes the fire and brimstone.I understand that wrong choices have natural consequences. When it comes to admitting what we’ve done some will be hurt, some may feel betrayed and relationships can be broken. But that is different from the vindictive, punitive attitude that often comes after one admits to doing something wrong.The more we judge, look down upon and condemn others when they have the guts to be honest, the less honesty we will see. What our actions will clearly teach them is that honesty is not always the best policy.Any time one confesses it should only be met with love, grace, mercy, compassion and a commitment to walk with them through whatever restoration is needed. As the people of God we must remember that we are recipients of grace, and what has been done for us must be done by us. But there’s one thing about grace that is so difficult. It demands we be honest.It’s only when we admit that we are a mess that we open ourselves up to the beautiful power of grace. It seems, after all, honesty is indeed the best policy. Let's show everyone how true that really is.

JUDGING MARK DRISCOLL

Yesterday, Mark Driscoll made a judgment call about the faith of President Obama. He tweeted “Praying for our president, who today will place his hand on a Bible he does not believe to take an oath to a God he likely does not know.”The problem with this is that Driscoll not only used his platform to cast such a stone, but he thought it wise to judge the faith of a person he does not know. There is always a danger in attempting to judge whether or not a person is a Christian. One’s relationship with God is deeply complex, and should not receive the kind of speculation it often does.With this in mind, there is one major disadvantage to this whole scenario. That being Twitter itself. Every tweet only allows the user 140 characters to say anything. Being that Driscoll gave no reason for tweeting what he did; it gives way to much speculation.If we are not careful, this speculation can lead to us making our own judgment of Driscoll, and tweeting things back that may even be more judgmental than what he wrote. No matter what we think of what Driscoll tweeted it is not our place to return judgment for judgment.We cannot fool ourselves into believing that we now have a right to judge him. This will only lead to greater division. What we can do is take this opportunity to remember that we all judge others at different times. With this in mind, it may be helpful to think about judgment, and why we all seem to hate it so much.All judgment is made from certain perspectives, varying preconceptions and differing viewpoints. Judgment is always biased. To ignore this reality is arrogant, and to ignore this reality when commenting on another person’s faith is dangerous.Making a judgment on another person’s faith can easily communicate that the one making the judgment knows exactly what a Christian is and what a Christian is not. It is as though they have a grid that establishes the proper parameters of Christianity itself.Which raises some questions: Is there more than one grid? If so, who determines what that grid is? Which grid should we use when determining the faith and beliefs of another person? Who are the ones that get to use it? Does the grid ever change?Whenever we judge the faith of others we fail to see that Christianity is not a faith that demands we agree on every social issue, hold to the same theology or agree on every aspect of biblical interpretation. This is what makes the Christian faith so vibrant.We have the joy of journeying alongside those who think differently - learning from them and sharing with them. Our job is not to judge, but to act justly and to love mercy and to walk humbly with God. We are to love others without any strings attached. Judgment does not lead to this; instead it moves us further from the heart of Jesus.I have never seen a statement of judgment led to greater unity; in fact the opposite is true, it always leads to division. And this is true whether we make a judgment about the faith of President Obama or the attitude and words of Mark Driscoll. Judgment, in the end, can actually work against the prayer of Jesus when he prayed in John 17 that his people would be one even as he and his father are one.And now, a word to Mark Driscoll.Mark, you have been given an immense, influential platform. I call you today, as a brother and fellow pastor, to use that platform wisely – not forgetting that to whom much is given, much is required. No one expects you to be perfect - least of all me, who knows through personal experience what imperfection is all about.With this in mind, your tweet about the President has caused division and anger among our fellow brothers and sisters. In the past, you have shown that you have the humility to apologize when you have misspoken or said the wrong thing at the wrong time. For what it’s worth, if I can make a judgment of my own, this is one of those times, and it calls for an apology.Brother, my hope for you is the same for myself; that your words would only serve to move those who listen toward the mind and heart of Jesus. May we both strive toward that end, so that, when all is said and done, we will see at last God’s kingdom come, and His will be done,
 on this earth as it is in heaven.

WORDS FROM DR. KING

Today is the day that we, as a nation, remember and celebrate Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. Dr. King preached many compelling sermons, wrote with tremendous depth and lived with an enduring faith.In November of 1967, he preached a sermon about Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego in November 1967 at Ebenezer Baptist Church in Atlanta, GA. In it he said the following:“You may be 38 years old, as I happen to be. And one day, some great opportunity stands before you and calls you to stand up for some great principle, some great issue, some great cause. And you refuse to do it because you are afraid… You refuse to do it because you want to live longer… You're afraid that you will lose your job, or you are afraid that you will be criticized or that you will lose your popularity, or you're afraid that somebody will stab you, or shoot at you or bomb your house; so you refuse to take the stand. Well you may go on and live until you are 90, but you're just as dead at 38 as you would be at 90. And the cessation of breathing in your life is but the belated announcement of an earlier death of the Spirit. You died when you refused to stand up for right. You died when you refused to stand up for truth. You died when you refused to stand up for justice.”May we not die, but live.