I Am Judas Iscariot

From Giotto di Bondone, Judas' Betrayal, Cappella Scrovegni, Padua, 1304-06

It was on Wednesday of Holy Week that Judas Iscariot met and colluded with the priests to betray Jesus. Perhaps you, like me, prefer to think about Judas while telling yourself that you are nothing like him.

However, maybe it would be more honest, not to comfort ourselves, but to be honest and consider the ways in which we are like him. And not only like him, but how we are like all the disciples who failed Jesus.

How are we like James and John who were bound and determined to gain positions of power? In what ways do we resemble Peter who lied about having any association with Jesus? Where do we see ourselves as all the disciples, when Jesus was arrested, scattered? It wasn’t only Judas who failed Jesus - all the disciples did.

In the days leading up to Jesus’ arrival in Jerusalem he told his disciples repeatedly that he was going there to die. Each time the disciples missed the point of what he was saying. They didn’t buy into his plan, but could only think about seats of privilege and power. There they were following Jesus, who made himself nothing, arguing about who had become the greatest.

To say they missed the point would be an understatement, for it seems they were not even aware there was a point. The disciples all failed Jesus, and all of us continue to do the same.

Jesus continually called his followers not to “receive him as their savior,” but to “participate with him in his death.” Is it possible we still miss the point entirely today? 

Jesus still invites us to die so that we might truly live. He said, “If you want to be my disciple you have to deny yourself and be willing to take up the cross and imitate me.” This was not a clever metaphor. He was inviting his disciples to stand with him against the forces of darkness, sin and violence – to pass through death to resurrection.

It’s no wonder they failed him, and it’s no wonder that I fail him. This is why, during this last week of Lent, we continue to look within to find the places where the voice of Judas is louder than the voice of Jesus. It’s why we confess, change our minds and hearts, and choose to once again participate with Jesus in his death.

It’s taking on the attitude and mindset of Jesus. It’s about dying with him, so that we might truly live.