god helped you do what?
Sunday night my phone rang. My friend was calling to make sure I was okay, and to see if our faith community was in any way connected to the shootings that took place in Arvada and Colorado Springs on Sunday. We chatted for a time about it. I told him how awful it was, and how just that morning in my teaching I spoke of how, “… we can even meet together without fear.” Little did I know that hours after that comment a faith community forty miles south of us would be forced to deal with unspeakable tragedy.
Now, just two days after the shootings details are slowly emerging. Of course, many are comparing the shooter, Matthew Murray, to the two young men from the Columbine massacre. There are psychologists being interviewed about what kind of person the shooter was, there are people from both places being interviewed on CNN, NBC, the Today show, and other media outlets. Everyone wants to know more and more.
In all of these interviews and commentaries I have watched the men and women from the church side of things with particular interest. I can say confidently that I do not know what I would do in this situation, either during or after the shooting. One interview however gave me pause. Perhaps it is too early to weigh in with a few thoughts on this, as the wounds are still fresh. I realize that the possibility of being considered insensitive is high. However, I was taken back by the comments of Jeanne Assam.
Assam is a former police officer and a member at New Life Church in Colorado Springs. She serves as an armed security officer at the church, and is believed to have been the one who shot and killed 24 year-old Matthew Murray. Her name was released on Monday and the carnivorous media crews lined up to speak with her. Because of this she granted a press conference yesterday.
What she said amazed me. Several of her quotes were posted from her interview on MSNBC and KUSA NBC Denver. When asked about her confrontation she spoke as an experienced fighter. She said, "I saw him coming through the doors and I took cover. And I waited for him to get closer and came out of cover and identified myself and engaged him and took him down,"
She continued as reporters leaned in to record what she was saying, "I was given the assignment to end this before it got too much worse … I said, 'Holy Spirit, please be with me.' I did not run away and I didn't think to run away. My hands weren't even shaking."
She then concluded with, "God was with me and I asked him to be with me and he never left my side … I was very focused and it was chaotic … I just knew what I had to do. It was me, the gunman and God."
Her commentary was echoed by one of the shooting victims, Larry Bourbannais, who claims that he ran toward the gunfire calling him a coward. He said, “I said [to an armed guard], ‘Gimme your handgun. I’ve been in combat. I’m going to take this guy out!’”
These people were called heroes, and were praised by the church leadership. I realize that they saved lives, but as I read these comments I thought, “Wait, wait, wait … God helped you to kill someone?” What struck me as odd is that none of these people have spoken about how painful it was to take the life of another person. Their attitude is much more triumphant about the killing, rather than saddened by Murray’s death. This is the feeling that I find most troubling.
Now I realize I am marching into a firestorm here. Many will say, “Well what else should she have done?” This is a reasonable question. I am not pointing fingers here saying they should have chosen another way. My intent is not to get into situational ethics, and speak of better ways to have handled this situation. I think that we jump immediately to “What would you have done?!” kinds of arguments because it is easier than dealing with the question at hand, which again is, “God steadied your hand so that you could shoot someone?”
Our society is so conditioned by violence that we cannot think of another way to respond to violence. Even more our churches are so conditioned by violence that when an armed volunteer takes the life of another human being (even with good reason), the church widely applauds and thanks God for his Holy Spirit that helped her take Murray down.
I am not sure I want to go there. No doubt what Matthew Murray did was awful. He was a troubled young man who acted in a cowardly way. He took the lives of innocent young people, and injured several others. I am not excusing his unbelievably violent act. But can we really stand and say confidently, “It was me, the gunman, and God?"
I expect that if it were only God and the gunman, that we would have seen a God who was deeply saddened. I do not expect that God would have pointed a gun and returned bullet for bullet. I do not expect that God would have yelled, “Gimme a gun, I’m gonna take him out!” I expect that God would have stood with his arms open, waiting for Matthew to turn to him. I suspect that God would have taken the wounds rather than inflict them, even the wounds that Matthew carried around that led him to commit such a heinous crime.
Was it wrong for Assam to kill Murray? I can only answer that by saying, “She definitely prevented more people from being killed, and God does not enjoy killing. Furthermore, I do not know what I would have done in the same situation.” However, I do not believe that for any reason one should invoke the name of God when taking the life of another human being, even a human being doing the things that Matthew Murray did.
The above quotes were taken from the following websites: www.9news.com www.msnbc.com
Now, just two days after the shootings details are slowly emerging. Of course, many are comparing the shooter, Matthew Murray, to the two young men from the Columbine massacre. There are psychologists being interviewed about what kind of person the shooter was, there are people from both places being interviewed on CNN, NBC, the Today show, and other media outlets. Everyone wants to know more and more.
In all of these interviews and commentaries I have watched the men and women from the church side of things with particular interest. I can say confidently that I do not know what I would do in this situation, either during or after the shooting. One interview however gave me pause. Perhaps it is too early to weigh in with a few thoughts on this, as the wounds are still fresh. I realize that the possibility of being considered insensitive is high. However, I was taken back by the comments of Jeanne Assam.
Assam is a former police officer and a member at New Life Church in Colorado Springs. She serves as an armed security officer at the church, and is believed to have been the one who shot and killed 24 year-old Matthew Murray. Her name was released on Monday and the carnivorous media crews lined up to speak with her. Because of this she granted a press conference yesterday.
What she said amazed me. Several of her quotes were posted from her interview on MSNBC and KUSA NBC Denver. When asked about her confrontation she spoke as an experienced fighter. She said, "I saw him coming through the doors and I took cover. And I waited for him to get closer and came out of cover and identified myself and engaged him and took him down,"
She continued as reporters leaned in to record what she was saying, "I was given the assignment to end this before it got too much worse … I said, 'Holy Spirit, please be with me.' I did not run away and I didn't think to run away. My hands weren't even shaking."
She then concluded with, "God was with me and I asked him to be with me and he never left my side … I was very focused and it was chaotic … I just knew what I had to do. It was me, the gunman and God."
Her commentary was echoed by one of the shooting victims, Larry Bourbannais, who claims that he ran toward the gunfire calling him a coward. He said, “I said [to an armed guard], ‘Gimme your handgun. I’ve been in combat. I’m going to take this guy out!’”
These people were called heroes, and were praised by the church leadership. I realize that they saved lives, but as I read these comments I thought, “Wait, wait, wait … God helped you to kill someone?” What struck me as odd is that none of these people have spoken about how painful it was to take the life of another person. Their attitude is much more triumphant about the killing, rather than saddened by Murray’s death. This is the feeling that I find most troubling.
Now I realize I am marching into a firestorm here. Many will say, “Well what else should she have done?” This is a reasonable question. I am not pointing fingers here saying they should have chosen another way. My intent is not to get into situational ethics, and speak of better ways to have handled this situation. I think that we jump immediately to “What would you have done?!” kinds of arguments because it is easier than dealing with the question at hand, which again is, “God steadied your hand so that you could shoot someone?”
Our society is so conditioned by violence that we cannot think of another way to respond to violence. Even more our churches are so conditioned by violence that when an armed volunteer takes the life of another human being (even with good reason), the church widely applauds and thanks God for his Holy Spirit that helped her take Murray down.
I am not sure I want to go there. No doubt what Matthew Murray did was awful. He was a troubled young man who acted in a cowardly way. He took the lives of innocent young people, and injured several others. I am not excusing his unbelievably violent act. But can we really stand and say confidently, “It was me, the gunman, and God?"
I expect that if it were only God and the gunman, that we would have seen a God who was deeply saddened. I do not expect that God would have pointed a gun and returned bullet for bullet. I do not expect that God would have yelled, “Gimme a gun, I’m gonna take him out!” I expect that God would have stood with his arms open, waiting for Matthew to turn to him. I suspect that God would have taken the wounds rather than inflict them, even the wounds that Matthew carried around that led him to commit such a heinous crime.
Was it wrong for Assam to kill Murray? I can only answer that by saying, “She definitely prevented more people from being killed, and God does not enjoy killing. Furthermore, I do not know what I would have done in the same situation.” However, I do not believe that for any reason one should invoke the name of God when taking the life of another human being, even a human being doing the things that Matthew Murray did.
The above quotes were taken from the following websites: www.9news.com www.msnbc.com